Ok so heres how it is.
After taking a Hiatus (only logging on for Updates (Can’t belive how many subcribers i got (3 new followers i believe.))) im back to explain why i’ve been gone (No character designs, no journals, not even commenting.)
You see, after Posting Chapter one of Nightwing vs Jeff the Killer ((My own version of Nightwing, not Dick Grayson) a story i started after me and an Ex broke up.) i was basically Trolled by someone just starting to cause emotional trouble. After getting frustrated, Yes, Frustrated. I worked a long time on that one chapter. I worked on it at church, showed my friend Joseph, even proofread it in hopes to give it that...feel of it being a somewhat “Batman” story even Though it was set in our world. Well, i didn’t respond to the troll. Given he gave me every right mind you, however he was blocked from my page.
I went on to contact the Admins for dA, in which they told me that they couldn’t find anything wrong nor could they do anything. So ive been gone (yes to be) afraid to post something since.
However, thats not to say that it damaged my spirit. Seeing as how it seems like deviantArt can care less for stuff like this, i’ve taken a hiatus from it. Discovered that i have 3 new followers (one seems to actually be cool), started following someone on here again (dunno how long that’ll last.), as well as it seeming like someone is actually willing to communicate back and forth with me on here (see the comment above.). So yes, ive been gone, Hiatus. Oh well.
Also i’d like to point out that the friend i had when i was dating my ex seems to be stuck in high school and doesn’t even know how to be a friend. If your friend is going through a break up, you help them through it. Not treat them like crap, not treat them like the bad guy not even shun them by treating them like they should just crawl under a rock and die. Boo frickendy hoo, my attitude and face reminded you of an Ex. And? You claim to be a part of a faith where they commit to “good works” and Friendship? But where is that when someone either needs you or tries to interact. At least when i dont like someone i have a valid reason to not like them. Least i get to know a head of time what kind of person they are. And yes, i get that they have friends who im friends with but im not the kind of person to tell them they should abandon them. Instead, i let them discover that for their own.
I also took a bigger step in my life. 2-3 years ago i started going back to church. Thinking it would help improve me spiritually. Thought being the keyword. However, it didn’t really help. Hoping i could keep to my business as usual thing i discovered this, no matter what i did, how i felt, how i tried to help anyone with the same struggles i went through, there’d be someone on the sidelines waiting to swoop in basically call garbage and make it seem like im the biggest idiot ever as well as the Pawn of The Advesary. Here’s the thing. Yes. People suffer from depression. Yes there is a time to bring up god and his love and blessings. But, not everyone wants to hear it when they’re to the point of cutting themselves or suicide. Sometimes a person just has to listen. A person wants to know that, “YEah, ok so you do this, or you feel this way. I dont agree with you or that but i’m here if you need it or im here to listen.” not “i don’t agree with your actions so i will see you as a person who is the most terrible person on the planet.” cause frankly, in all fairness i’ve had the pleasure of meeting those not of the faith, who are the greatest people i’ve met and all they want is to be left alone regarding it and about 75% of the time i’ve met people of the faith who have been the worst people i’ve met or have had the pleasure of meeting. For the most, i’ve come to know people who understand where it is i’ve been. The pleasure of knowing people who love a person not for their past, but who they’ve become because of it. A person who wanted to change their life and has had a past he’s not proud of but doesn’t allow him to justify where his place is. Even the one who understands it’s ok to be different. Or even the person who understands when their closest friend is wrong about something yet still decides to play the mutual party.
Yes i still believe in god. But no, if a person decides to persecute someone because of their path, because of their choices, because they believe in taking the side of the accuser instead of the accused, what sort of example is that setting for the world. Alot of people can see this decision im making as one of fear, of cowardice (i know same thing), or even weak-willed (also (possibly) same thing) or any negative emotion or evil stance on things, but i’m chosing to see it as one of stregnth. One of Hope that eventually in time, i will learn to be happy without the church i was initially forced to join when my mother was going to church. Cause last week when i left after my friend came back, i didn’t look back, i didn’t look down in disappointment, i smiled. I smiled cause i knew that i was happy. Though there are those who can tell another story, i at least know the truth.
In conclusion, i would like to say this. Im sorta back with an ex who actually treats me better than most of the women i saw after her have treated me. Im actually the happiest i’ve ever been, no buts about it. I’m happy in my life, i smile cause i have all that i need. I have the love of a woman who treats me like i’m worth keeping. Who doesn’t take me for granted. Who makes me feel more alive just by talking to her. I have the faith knowing that god (or whoever it is) loves me. I have a job where i’m needed and appreciated. I have friends who actually give two shits about me rather than treat me like garbage. I have people who actually want me to be happy in my own way. And lastly, I know that i am safe.
However, due to my laptop being a piece of crap (might need to get a new one.) No uploads for now. I’m also currently working on my series which will be facebook only. Not gonna post it on here for, well, reasons. Not because of the guy from before, but because it’s an original series using an idea i had when i was in high school so, not looking to get the idea taken or stolen by someone or getting sued.